Square pegs, round holes…

A friend recently spoke to me about whether to accept a particular offer or not… I helped him out and in the process realized that there would be lot of people out there who would need help on how to negotiate the salary…

Take some time always to consider the salary offer. Ask for the least of 24 to 48 hours. Silence is the golden - or it could become so - when you just let it hang for a while following the initial offer - people tend to fill in those voids which in turn fills up your kitty in the process too. Do not rush to fill a quiet void. Let the other person speak.

Weigh any of the offer against a company’s expectations of you in a position rather than your own needs. A company has put itself on line with its offer. Rest assured they do have a cap, but you might have some of the wiggle room (please understand that it’s a wiggle room not a hall - range will be 5-10%) based upon how much value a company perceives you could bring them.

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Spin Doctors…

You spin. You put things in the best possible light. You fail to mention those four hours you spent devoted to checking out mail from your friends marked ‘careful’ or ‘open when alone’, those two hours you slipped out to have an extended lunch with your friends (I can’t believe they schedule these lunch timings - how do you know when you will be hungry…), and that 1 hour period every day after lunch when you sit at your desk in a massive food coma. You don’t mention these things, because they call-in to question your job performance. You highlight the good stuff that you have done, or you highlight the reasons why you haven’t produced more good stuff - i.e. you felt alien presence in the room where you were working on the papers or you were thinking about why your co-worker is never at her desk…

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Payback time…

In this ‘festive’ (’festive’ for 5% and ‘bloody’ for the rest 95%) season it is apt that we recognize the talent of those 5% people who are at the top. To understand more about these 5% ‘performers’ you will need to look at the make-up (notice: (for girls) please don’t worry about your mascara, it’s not running… now pay attention) of the society… Who forms the top 5% of the crowd? No prizes for guessing… its the politicians, mafia bosses, actors, CEOs and some highly placed corrupt officials…

Do you see a similarity between that spineless ass that sits next to you seemingly doing nothing productive the entire day and walks away with the biggest bonus? If not you have to… these people are very adept at using all their energies towards maneuvering for political advantage… this is called being ‘Machiavellian’ (Definition: Machiavellianism is the term that some social and personality psychologists use to describe a person’s tendency to deceive and manipulate others for personal gain. The concept is named after Renaissance diplomat and writer Niccolò Machiavelli, who wrote The Prince) [Awe at my knowledge; duration: 30 seconds]

Now you are thinking that this post is turning into a guidebook of how to ‘butter your boss’, ‘kiss ass’, ’suck up to…’ but I know you can’t do that hell… I would not be able to do that… so contrary to being ‘Machiavellian’ i am going to talk about something else… This idea flashed my mind yesterday lonesome midnight soiree (visual stimulation provided by ‘The Devil wears Prada’)… My father’s friend my friend’s father, who happens to be fantastic at humor, once said, “…those who make fun of others or make others laugh look down or consider their audience dumber…”

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